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Sunday, January 13th, 2008
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5:49 pm
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| Thursday, June 7th, 2007
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2:33 pm
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Well, I decided not to go... I want to hug the boy tho :(
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(comment on this)
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| Thursday, May 31st, 2007
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11:07 pm
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I have a dilemma.
As some of you know, I have been teaching English at a private school here in Belgrade. One of my classes is comprised of a girl, and two boys; they're all about 17 years old.
About three weeks ago, my boss spoke to me, saying that she felt that one of the boys, Milan, was 'in love with [me]'. She gave me a warning not to give out my mobile number or email address or anything. Now, I assumed she was just being weird and paranoid, because she is a bit of a psycho. I thought at the most he had a crush on me, or perhaps he was a little fixated on me, because there's not exactly many gay people here - maybe he's just drawn to me for that reason.
Anyway, yesterday, he invited me to his birthday party. I kinda sputtered and said maybe, and at the end of the class we all swapped email addresses, since it was the last class I had with them all. I spoke to my boss again today, and didn't mention any of this, of course, but she did again say that he could cause problems, specifically that if he got interested in me, then got knocked back, he could be some kind of vengeful person and spread rumours that I had been touching him inappropriately, for example, which would ruin my boss's business. She also asked if he had asked for my number or anything, to which I said no - not a lie, since I gave it to him, he never asked.
So, the dilemma is, do I go to the party? On one hand, it could give Milan ideas, the wrong ideas! And consequently, it could cause the problems above. And if he mentioned it to her (which would be dumb, but he might), she would probably be very angry. (I'm undecided as to whether that's a good thing or not - my boss isn't one of my favourite people).
On the other hand, I'm no longer his teacher, and who is my boss to tell me what I can and can't do in my own time? This party sounds potentially cool (he said to bring someone else, since I wouldn't know anyone, obviously), and also, he's a nice guy. Would be cool to spend time with him, since I don't have many friends here, and also, I find the whole thing sweet, and I don't want to hurt him.
So... dilemma dilemma... Thoughts?
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11:01 pm
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11. Charles Pellegrino and George Zebrowski - Dyson Sphere
Another Star Trek book. Some Star Trek books are great, and focus much more on the fiction side of science-fiction, and include excellent characterisation and complex plotting. This has neither. Well, it's complex, but that's because of the science. This book gets so bogged down in its science that the plot suffers badly. Added to that, some of the science feels a bit dodgy (how can two planets, a long way apart, get the same climate from the same sun?), and an attempt to depict an apocalyptic scenario, which shows promise, dies on its feet from just being visualised so badly.
I couldn't wait to get to the end of this book, which is a shame for something which could have been great. Scientists shouldn't write fiction.
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(comment on this)
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| Sunday, May 27th, 2007
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5:09 pm
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9. Zoe Heller - Notes on a Scandal
Absolutely brilliant. A skilled study into human psychology, and the way the mind works. Heller manages to bring across Barbara's loneliness excellently, and allows you to identify with what could otherwise be a blindly evil character. I often enjoy books which have an unreliable narrator, as it allows you to investigate and analyse the character, and see what may be really behind motives.
I enjoyed the book a lot, lot more than the movie, partly because it's so much harder to pull off an unreliable narrator on screen.
10. George Orwell - Nineteen Eighty-Four
I don't have to say much about this, you all know what it is. I thoroughly enjoyed it, mainly because it wasn't just a scare book of what could happen if... etc etc, and it very much has a human side to the story. I always find that important - human emotion is vital to allow you to identify with a book, and consequently to deliver the message.
New Top 10:
1. Zoe Heller - Notes on a Scandal
2. George Orwell - Nineteen Eighty-Four
3. Toby Litt - Finding Myself
4. Michael Crichton - Disclosure
5. Matthew Collins - This is Serbia Calling
6. Michael Crichton - Airframe
7. Douglas Coupland - Miss Wyoming
8. Jennifer Donneley - A Gathering Light
9. Imogen Edwards-Jones - Air Babylon
10. David Gerrold - Encounter at Farpoint
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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| Thursday, May 3rd, 2007
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5:26 pm
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AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!
I have succumbed. I have joined Facebook.
BAH
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| Tuesday, April 24th, 2007
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4:07 pm
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8. Jennifer Donnelly - A Gathering Light
The cover of this book doesn't give a very good impression of it. It makes it seem quite different to what it is, which is, well, a bit 'womany' for me. It also gives away an important plot point that isn't actually revealed until about three-quarters of the way into the book.
Nevertheless, I quite enjoyed it, once I struggled past the first 50 or 60 pages. The characters feel very real, and I felt a lot of emotions invested in the novel, feeling for the plight of many of the characters, stuck in small-town America around 1900, and the desperation and helplessness experienced by many is well-described. Which makes the ending, in which everything suddenly gets solved in about 20 pages, feel a bit of a cheat. I put the book down, not feeling happy for the characters, but feeling disappointment for myself. I read all of that, for *that*?!
For the most part I enjoyed this book. Strong writing, involving characters and situations and an interesting, developing plot. However, the weaving of Mattie's story into that of Grace, whose letters she reads, is weak and contrived, and the two aren't anywhere near as connected as the story thinks. And the ending left me deflated.
Whilst I actually quite enjoyed this book, it doesn't come recommended.
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| Monday, April 23rd, 2007
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12:00 am
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Right, time for some more book-stuff!
5. Toby Litt - Finding Myself
Just finished this one, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. The subject matter isn’t heavy in the slightest, but it really does give a lot of pause for thought. It’s easy to read, but I feel that it can raise a lot of questions, which made it especially enjoyable for me.
On the surface, it is the story of Victoria, a novelist who invites a group of her friends to a seaside house, in order to observe their activities and make it into a novel. Of course, nothing goes to plan, but I’ll let you read the book to find out exactly what! It’s a story of manipulation, of what goes on inside people’s heads, and how they feel about themselves and about one another. I thoroughly enjoyed it for the reasons I outline above – it’s an easy, unchallenging read, but there’s plenty to think about both during the story, and afterwards.
Highly recommended!
6. Imogen Edwards-Jones - Air Babylon
Another unchallenging read, but this one has nothing under the surface. Edwards-Jones has done much research into the airline industry to get gossip and information about things that happen, all those juicy stories you read about in the press. She has then dramatised them – all into one group of characters in one day. The main character has many things happen to him and his friends, interspersed with him telling stories of things he’s heard, or happened to him before.
It’s a fun read, but part of the problem is that the idea behind the book means that there is no real plot – just twists. We never really care about these characters, however much Edwards-Jones tries to flesh them out; everytime they gain a little more depth, they become more of a caricature and more ridiculous. Of course, it isn’t meant to be read as a standard fiction book, it’s just a fun romp around the juicy stories of the airline industry. It kind of works… just as long as you don’t try and think too hard.
7. David Gerrold - Encounter At Farpoint
The novelisation of the pilot episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. Not a great book, hampered by the TV episode itself not being anything thrilling. Gerrold also attempts to add background to some of the characters, which, by the end of the series, had been completely contradicted on screen. In addition, in scenes added for the book, a lot of character voices just 'sound' wrong. Both these things were probably pretty much unavoidable when the book was written, but unfortunately and unavoidably take away from the overall experience. Not a bad book, a passable diversion.
The updated chart:
1. Toby Litt - Finding Myself
2. Michael Crichton - Disclosure
3. Matthew Collins - This is Serbia Calling
4. Michael Crichton - Airframe
5. Douglas Coupland - Miss Wyoming.
6. Imogen Edwards-Jones - Air Babylon
7. David Gerrold - Encounter at Farpoint
I'm most of the way through Book 8, so more reviews coming soon :)
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| Sunday, April 22nd, 2007
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9:04 pm
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I've had a pretty shitty day. I've been thinking a lot recently, about all sorts of stuff. Decided to go lie in bed to have a think, rather than sitting online and getting more frustrated. I ended up falling asleep for a little bit, and ended up feeling tired and irritable for a while. Here's my attempt to actually write down everything I composed in my head.
I'm just starting to get fed up of everything. I feel pretty alone here at the moment, and I do wonder if it is my own fault, brought on by myself. It probably is my own fault. And I don't know, I guess I'm incapable of solving this, incapable of changing myself over the years.
It's often said that one of the great things about the Year Abroad (and university in general) is the great social life, the opportunity to meet new people, and have lots of fun without worrying too much about work and consequences. Thing is, I haven't managed to do that at all this year.
I think a lot of it started with when I decided to take a flat, rather than remaining in the student halls like the majority of people did. This decision was motivated mainly by having the space for Martin to come over and visit, as we were hoping he'd be able to come over here quite a bit. Therefore I needed privacy and space, neither of which I had in halls - two people in a room of about 12 feet by 5 feet is not exactly conducive to that. Having my own flat has meant that I also have cable TV, and internet, so I can communicate with Martin and other friends plenty, and I have plenty of stuff to distract me from my own mind.
So, I am automatically cut off from everyone in halls, and that's compounded by the flat being quite a distance from the centre. That's meant that, while I'm sat here on the internet by myself each evening, they're in halls chatting away and generally socialising. Generally, they do this in Serbian now, and I know that I probably could not function well enough in the language to have a good time in that situation. That's partly because some people are a lot better than me, but partly because, having cut myself off from that environment, I've not had so much opportunity to speak Serbian and assimilate it, and therefore I haven't improved enough, therefore making me more of an outsider as the year has gone on. It would be difficult to get into those groups now.
So yeah, I'm just a bit fed up of always being here in my flat by myself, knowing that other people are out, probably having a great time and chatting away in Serbian. It preys on my mind, because it's quite often been this way, and certainly was at school (except for the Serbian part). I got on well enough with people in a school situation, but when it came to evening going-out, I was at home by myself. The only time it wasn't like that was in my first year at uni.
As I said, the other side effect of this is that my language hasn't improved enough since I have been here. I still don't feel confident enough to have more than a basic conversation in Serbian, and this means that I am failing to do enough reading for my essay, and for my courses next year. (In contrast, my grammar has improved a lot, and Millie and I both agree that I'm better in that area.) I spent quite a bit of time wallowing about that today. And part of the problem is, when I get down about something, like not having done any work, I get really lethargic and demotivated, and don't do anything about it. Which has been the case for years now.
I really do need to sort my head out. I need to stop getting demotivated, and kick myself in the ass occasionally to do work. I also need to decide what I want. How important is it to me to have made friends here, for example? Being honest, there's a good amount of people I actively dislike, and a good amount of others I would have very little in common with. But it's stories from other friends on their Years Abroad, who talk about the great times they have, from parties and clubbing, to dinners and trips out together with new people they've met, which make me wonder how much I've missed out on. People talk about the life experience gained on a Year Abroad... But how much have I realistically experienced?
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| Sunday, April 15th, 2007
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4:54 pm
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The Hits appears to be claiming that 'A Whole New World' is from Alanis Morrissette: The Musical.
Mind you, so's 'You're the One That I Want', 'Shakalaka Baby' and 'Don't Cry for Me Argentina'
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| Saturday, March 31st, 2007
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12:54 am
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Oh, I was going to do an entry about the books I've read. I saw Fi's post about doing the 50 Books Challenge thing. I'm certainly not going to make it to that many, but here's what I've read so far.
1. Michael Crichton - Disclosure
2. Michael Crichton - Airframe
I'll put these two together and comment on them as one. Both quite similar books, pretty basic thrillers, but enjoyable nonetheless. I liked Disclosure more, since Airframe was pretty technical, and less 'human' in its approach, but nice easy reads for the bus!
3. Douglas Coupland - Miss Wyoming
An odd book. Halfway between being heavily emotional and being a strange parody of American life. It seems to be described as a clever parody by the cover, but the parody is so subtle to almost be unnoticeable, and just comes across as an interesting story, blown apart by incongruous things happening to the characters from time to time. I didn't not enjoy it, but it didn't leave any real impact on me. I've read several Coupland books now, and I much prefer his more human, thoughtful novels (Eleanor Rigby, Hey Nostradamus) to the more... I can't find an adjective for them, anywaym, his earlier stuff (Generation X, Microserfs), the latter of which left me strangely empty. Anyway, I was disappointed by Miss Wyoming, which overall kinda fell between the two categories Coupland normally writes in.
4. Matthew Collins - This is Serbia Calling
A non-fiction book, obstentially (is that a word?) charting the history of independent Serbian radio station B92 throughout the 1990s, but also making forays into exploring the wider politics (usually not very well, at a far too basic level), but also the influence of music in general during the period. I thoroughly enjoyed it, despite its obvious flaws, and it will come in very useful as a source for my Project.
So, the Book Chart of 2007:
1. Michael Crichton - Disclosure
2. Matthew Collins - This is Serbia Calling
3. Michael Crichton - Airframe
4. Douglas Coupland - Miss Wyoming.
I'm now halfway through Book 5... See you when I've finished it :)
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12:46 am
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Well, hello everybody.
I havem't posted in ages have I? And that's cos there's really is nothing going at all. I have been going to class, getting drunk, and going to work (sometimes in that order). The classes have been getting better, mainly as a result of not going to some of them - I just go to the classes given by Vesna, as she is a much better teacher, and I learn loads from her. As for Nebojsa, the most interesting thing that has happened in his class for weeks is us realising that he bears a worrying resemblance to Wolf from Gladiators.
Work has been better too, mainly because I have only been teaching my regular students, on Tuesday and Wednesday nights. The topics we work on aren't too bad, though I enjoy the Wednesday classes more, since we often just end up chatting. There's three kids (well, I say kids, they're 16 or 17 or so) - Aleksandar is hot but rarely shows up. Milan is very tall and extremely sweet and blatantly gay. He's thinking of going to study in the UK. And Dasha is cool, and is a big fan of the Amazing Race, so much so that, in one class where she was the only one to show up, we spent most of the time debating the merits of Flo.
Have been getting quite drunk with Millie a lot recently. Really glad she's here, we have a lot of fun, just sitting and drinking wine and chatting.
Other than that, nothing special has happened. We were going to go on an excursion on Sunday but I didn't get up in time. And that really is it. I am off back home on Thursday though, for 10 days, so hopefully see some of you around then!
current music: Alisson Krause and John Waite - Missing Ypu
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| Friday, March 2nd, 2007
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5:35 pm
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Remember Scooch? Bit like Steps but not as good?
Well, they're back. They're one of six acts competing to become the UK's Eurovision entry in Helsinki. Their song is, well... rather gay :)
Download here
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(4 comments | comment on this)
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| Monday, February 26th, 2007
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8:38 pm
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Evening.
I have sat myself down on the couch with a nice blanket on me, and a less nice glass of wine (you can't go toooo wrong when it's a euro for a litre!), and it's time to moan and de-stress.
Had a pleasant weekend. Did arse all, but did go to the supermarket on Friday, which was very constructive of me (after having woken up *after* class had finished). Spent most of the weekend curled up on the sofa watching TV or on the internet.
Wot i wotched:
Survivor: Loving this new series less, I'm not convinced the twist really works. But I'm sure it'll work out. God bless eMule, I manage to download the episodes around 3 days after they broadcast in the US, which isn't bad really.
Melodifestivalen semi-final: Pleasant enough, my favourite got through, so yay.
Spanish Final: Jesus... That went on! If I ever hear La reina de la noche again I think I will go potty.
Deutschland sucht den Superstar: Impressively non-shit singing for Germans.
Montenegrosong: Yeah, decided to punish myself. It was surprisingly enjoyable, and not too long either (yes Spain, I'm looking at you!).
On the ESC songs chosen this weekend:
Armenia: Pleasant, possibly forgettable, I like it.
Macedonia: Very cool, poppy but still ethno.
Bulgaria: Insane, course I like it.
Spain: Bleeeh - not bad I suppose, but I'm so sick of all those 5 songs.
Belgium came out on Friday and is shit.
Switzerland: Yayness. Silly but cool.
Cyprus still does nothing for me.
Montenegro: Pleasant enough, not got the punch to perform though.
And Latvia's arse too.
So, yes, constructive weekend for me.
Today I had class. Not in the going-to-uni sense, but in the going-to-a-school-miles-away sense, to teach English. I can't remember if I mentioned the English teaching I'm doing, but if not, I'll write about that properly sometime!
Today was a bit of a nightmare. Three classes of primary school kids. First class was fine, they settled down and did the exercise I'd given them, and did it well. The second was, as always, terrible. Too many kids for me to keep a handle on, and they didn't really get what I wanted them to do, and they're just sooo naughty, especially one kid. I think said kid was the principal's son, and we're supposed to be nice to him, but fuck that! Made him sit in the corner by himself. BWAHAHAHA! The third class was fine - did the exercise I wanted them to do (matching up numbers to the written form), then loved the book I'd brought (press the button to make the sheep noise), then played the BORING colour game, but it kept them occupied!
Still can't roll my fucking rrrs though, which means kids misunderstand a lot!
Had nice pizza on the way home :))
Got stressed when I got home too. Been thinking about when Martin comes next week. He has to be registered, but I can't, since I don't officially live here, so had to ask Ivana's mother last time, and she's agreed to do it again. I don't like asking, cos they are doing something illegal, and since Martin will be coming again in May, and Ryan coming in late March, I don't want to ask too much. And then I'm worried about whether we have to de-register when we go to Bosnia for a couple of days... Bleeeeh. So much I don't really understand, and it stresses me out, cos if it does go wrong then it could go very wrong...
The plan for tonight is to chill out in front of TV - I managed to tune in FOX, clever me, so I can watch Amazing Race repeats tonight :)). And tomorrow... uni, then teaching in the evening.
See you all soon :)
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| Saturday, February 24th, 2007
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2:20 pm
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Hello everyone! I've not updated in a while, so here's a proper update.
I feel a bit like the lady in the userpic at the moment (not that I'm getting divorced). Have had a bit of a rough couple of days emotionally, one around boyfriend issues, the other around friends issues. The former is sorted out now, I don't know about the latter.
I didn't go into uni the last two days. I'd been feeling really rough during the early parts of this week, but I still went into work, and my boss went on and on at me until I agreed to work on Tuesdays and Wednesdays, so I couldn't very well turn round and say no. In the end the classes (both at uni, and the ones I taught) were fine, but pretty exhausting. Decided to take Thursday off uni, and then I woke up yesterday after the class had already finished. Oops!
My friend Simon and his boyfriend Morten visited last weekend. I'm not convinced they really liked it here; I think they were expecting something a bit more modern and touristy, which Belgrade really isn't especially on a wet weekend in February. June, maybe... February, no. They didn't even like the Serbian boys! I did have to jump off a moving train - I sat on it with them on the platform, since it was raining, and it wasn't due to leave for another half an hour. Then it started moving! I had to leap out down on to the platform!
At the moment I'm lay on the sofa writing this, and I'm really snotty and keep sneezing... I think I'm allergic to my flat. I guess it's time to get the vacuum out and suck up some dust!
current mood:  aggravated
current music: Bulgarian Final songs
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| Friday, February 16th, 2007
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12:59 am
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| Friday, February 2nd, 2007
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12:59 am
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Thanks to everyone who was at our quiz last night. I had a really great time, and sorry for being sooo drunk! I certainly felt the after-effects later and this morning too :(((
See you all soon!
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| Thursday, February 1st, 2007
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7:37 pm
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| Monday, January 29th, 2007
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1:32 am
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EUROVISION ALERT: LOOK AWAY IF NOT INTERESTED!
I said a month ago that I loved Moldova, and would be surprised if anything beat it this year. And yet, here we have a song that does just that! And, second shocking thing... It's Belarus in a not-shite shocker!
( Video )
Since I uploaded them anyway, here's some mp3s...
Belarus
Moldova
Albania
END OF EUROVISION TALK!
I haven't updated properly in a little while, so here's a quick update. I'm back at my parents at the moment, going back to London tomorrow. I wanted to come back and see all my family for the last time before I head off to Belgrade again. Not really done much this weekend... Spent some time with my Mum, which was nice, and went to my Dad's yesterday for a few hours. Seeing Nan and Grandpa tomorrow too for lunch, before I head back.
Weirdly, I've really missed Martin this weekend. I've only been gone for two days, and we've spoken plenty on the phone, and been online loads, and yet... I think part of me is already thinking about when I'm back in Belgrade, and how it will feel then. It's not long now, and I'm not really looking forward to it at all. It's 4 weeks til he comes across, which will be easily the longest gap between us seeing each other for... about 18 months. He's hopefully coming across for Beovizija (the Serbian Euro-preselection), so that will be good :)
I've not done a great deal this month, so there's very little to report. Most of my days have been spent getting up late and sitting in front of the TV while Martin works, and then having the evening together. Have been in to uni a few times, but haven't done much work - whenever I go in to do reading I get very depressed and demoralised about the workload I have to do, and get very little done. It also doesn't help that they have wireless in the library now, so I spend ages chatting. I went into work the other day to see people and have a chat, and to hopefully get channels open, in the hope of getting my job back in June. Was nice to catch up with everyone and learn that Petra has had her baby.
I got new glasses too! Well, I don't have them yet, I had the appointment on Thursday, and have to go in this week to pick them up. I really need them, as these I'm wearing now are my spare spare set, after my good ones broke a year ago, then my spare in Belgrade. They don't suit my face, so hopefully the new ones will be a nice change.
WE WON THE QUIZ LAST WEEK!!! It was a small crowd, but was very pleased to win, especially since it was just Martin and me on our team! It's our quiz this week, and it's my last one before I go back, so would love to see as many people as possible there! Halfway 2 Heaven, Duncannon St, 8pm on Wednesday, £1 entry, max 4 per team.
current mood:  worried
current music: Dima Koldun - Work Your Magic
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| Thursday, January 18th, 2007
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5:26 pm
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Just had a slightly bizarre dream. Millie and I were out at a bar somewhere in London, and we bought these cocktails. You had to go to the loo to buy them, because they were illegal, yet they were Buy One Get One Free. Then, much later, Millie ran back to get some more drinks, because if you got their by midnight they’d still be BOGOF. She didn’t make it, cos now the streets were rivers (this happens quite a bit in my dreams). Then there was something where we were at this place that seemed to be a bit like a real-life eMule, so that was odd.
Then I met Fi and Will, and Millie had gone to Retro. Fi, Will, Lu and I went to Popstarz, which involved getting another boat, and then walking past Spamalot. The Scala had had a WHSmith built on the front. On the way in, Fi helped a woman with a baby carry a pushchair up the stairs, and assumed the baby was called Emma. This was because, according to dream Wikipedia, everyone’s first guess to a baby’s name is Emma, due to Rachel’s baby being called that in Friends. In fact, the reason she had made the mistake was because Lu’s baby is apparently called Emma. Right…
Then I woke up before we actually got to the club. Boo.
If you’re wondering why I’m sleeping at 5pm, it’s because I’m ill for no good reason. Was fine at last night’s quiz, then started feeling a bit rough on the train, and then very rough on the way from the station. Didn’t sleep well last night, lying awake a lot of the night aching. Got up early, but then went back to bed about midday (after Voyager ;)).
Quiz last night was a bit too much like hard work, complete with resident nutter shouting out answers, then trying to ‘help’ our team, and calling me camp (ME???? CAMP??? What-EVER!!!). Nice drinkies afterwards though, and congrats to Kat :)
Going to Hamburg for the weekend tomorrow morning (nice and early, further fucking up the sleep pattern). Really looking forward to the weekend!
current music: Wicked Soundtrack - Defying Gravity
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